Like taking your yearbook picture with spinach in your teeth

Ever since I signed up for the internet telephone service, Skype, I get random calls from people in India or Africa--all over the world--who want to practice their French.  I’m just like, “Listen Abjal, I feel your pain, but bro, you do NOT want to be practicing your French with someone who just today learned that her voicemail message, her voicemail message of the last eight months, has been informing the world that she is not 'disponsible.'” 

It’s basically as if my recording says, “Sorry folks, I am not AVAILRABLE right now.”

Comments

[petiteschoses]

Not to worry....I managed to believe(and tell others) that a little shop in the Marais, named Izrael ,contained jewish erotica! On the window it reads "produit exotiques"

[Ronica]

Oh, La. I laughed so hard my stomach hurt. A lot.

At least I am not the only one... (my 8-year old charge nearly bust a gut laughing last week when I told her to stop hitting herself over the head because I didn't want her to have pain on her head. Only I pronounced it a little closer to "bread on your head.")

I just have to say, (to quote some wonderful Chinese and Korean friends of mine)--

Congraulations!
Congladurations!

Welcome to France. :)

[Chris]

"Lip my stockings!"

"you want me to what?"

[Peppermint]

LOL!

[Julia]

Very funny!

I once asked a guy during the act "suis-je trop lourde" - when I wanted to ask "am I too loud". He was on top.

[juliana]

Ha, that's really funny! I take it you've changed it now.

[Stu "El Inglés" Harris]

There's nothing inappropriate about "pas disponible". That's exactly what the _official_ France Telecom phonebot says when you're trying to reach a switched-off portable.

[Coquette]

Too bad I said "pas disponSible"

[Neil]

I thought email was supposed to help us from having to speak to everyone on the phone. The big problem with these free internet phone services, especially from abroad, is that you don't have the excuse anymore of not calling your relatives.

[Lisa]

Makes me rather glad I decided to block Skype calls from people I don't know. I get enough interruptions in my day as it is.

Loved the other stories... 'specially Julia's!! It's hard to be sexy in another language.

[Coquette]

Neil, I know, but my friends are very divided--they either love or hate skype, and then a lot of people don't know what it is. No need to call them!

Lisa, I didn't know that feature existed! And I agree about being sexy in another language. It's tough. I also think you can be sexy for the wrong reasons. Like because you're inarticulate and with cute accent to boot.

[R J Keefe]

Perfect. The agonies of mastering a language after the age of four.

You're right: your father ought to get down on his knees and beg for your forgiveness.

[Stu "El Inglés" Harris]

Oh, oops, guess I missed the point. Je m'excuse....

[Poulette]

Coquette, what amazes me is that anyone actually answers these Skype calls from strangers! You must be one of those ubersweet girls who would never offend anyone, even a random Abjal caller! Great post, as always.

[DDJ]

I left my Skype open to callers for a short time, and had a handful of calls from people who wanted to practice their English. Nothing too racy, though. I should have said that my native language was French - then I could have told callers to pronounce the "s," thereby creating a whole mess of people who could share in your experience someday.

Hilarious translation of your message to English!

[GdP]

Dude, everyone makes the disponible/disponsible mistake. That's a quite advanced mistake. Worse is when americans pronounce beaucoup as "beau cul." And at my old job, a frog I worked with who prided himself on his (very bad) English, would insist on screaming "but eet was not forcasted!" for "mais ce n'etait pas prevu"

That was annoying.

[aru]

oh you will highly enjoy www.engrish.com

btw, i finally got my own blog - midget in paris!!

[Lauren]

8 months? How is it possible that no one warned you?? I have to take a day off work just to record a new answering machine message I'm so paranoid about it.

[la.dauphine]

I remember taking a tour of Paris and the very elegant female tour guide kept refering to the "constriction" of certain landmarks. No one corrected her, though. I think we all thought it was cute.

[schuey]

My VP of a boss still does not understand why I giggle like an idiot when his voicemail states, in miserable english : "i'm am not availalalable right now..."

[Tatyana]

When I just started my life in America and super in the building was making rounds to collect the rent, I opened the door to his buzz and said, with inviting gestures, "Come on!" instead of "come in"

I guess it was a bad hair day, literally: he was sending his wife for collections ever since.

[Neil]

If I sign up for Skype, does that mean I can call you up via my laptop when I have difficulty pronouncing something in a French restaurant?

[Dagny]

Hmmm, I may have to rethink signing up for Skype.

[Coquette]

Poulette, I'm not that nice, trust me. For instance, I have blocked "Neil" from my skype contact list.

[Miss Pink]

I have painful memories about people pointing out my bad pronounciation of english as well...I try to show that I am grateful to them for shwowing me the right path but deep inside I am so hurt...

[tsop]

my friend kept wanting me to sign for up skype but i never did. is the connection ok? i tried that internet phone thing once and the connection was terrible.

[tsop]

my friend kept wanting me to sign for up skype but i never did. is the connection ok? i tried that internet phone thing once and the connection was terrible.